What's up?

So I've been studying my nose off for the exam tomorrow and I still have about 6 pages to go, but it'll be alright. I hope. Anyway, I thought I would post a cute video I found on http://www.godtube.com, I'm sure at least some of you have seen it already (had 4 million views), but it never hurts to watch again. :)



Enjoy! I will try to post some more, but I really need to get back to these last pages of Biology...

Oh fine, one more video. :P



Now ya'll be up-to-date on the most popular Christian videos on the net. ;)

G-d bless,
sc

Just a little tired right now...

So today was a pretty amazing day, actually. I went to our local church in the morning, in the early morning...I volunteered for the Nursery a couple weeks back. Those toddlers are just so amazing! They really do seem to have unconditional love, a certain acceptance and joy that is rare to find these days (especially at foru.ms it seems). There were to girls and two boys there today, one of the boys dad was a volunteer too so he was with daddy. The other 3 were more quiet than usual, it seemed like the whole church was just dead-gone tired today, but they were energetic nevertheless! Our first stop: The Slide. The Slide is a wonderful thing; it let's us climb up and down the slanted slope, the walls, the doors, the platforms. There's even a basement of sorts! Then there's The Ball(s); these are the round little things, they can be big and blue, or just small and yellow; they even make noise! And The House, who can forget The House?! From climbing out the windows and doing flips, to playing pick-a-boo and hide-and-seek. It's the most natural thing in the world. There are even Babies to accompany us for the 10 minutes we're interested in them! Snack Time is the most favorite time of the day, besides Story Time and the pictures that naturally come along with it.
Honestly, sometimes I think that toddlers see the world as one big playground. From the nametag/lanyard hanging around my neck, to the graham crackers that are at snack time. Even the people who just finished their youth group lessons! The world has a lot to learn from these little people. They love everyone, everything, and naturally cling to their mommy and daddy.
Mommy and Daddy....Mommy and Daddy....I wonder if we can use that analogy for the Trinity? With the Holy Spirit being Mommy, the Father being Daddy, and Jesus being the Son. But I'm getting sidetracked.
After the Nursery I was off to church for yet another sermon by the pastor, but this one was different. Actually, I forgot what the sermon was about, but I do know that it was related to last weeks. And last weeks was profound. It was about kindness, about our roles as Christians. He started by saying that there are churches where we feel that we aren't welcome. He heard of people telling him how that other church is fine and has great music, but that church is not really "kind". And then he pulled a shocker. He heard the same thing about our church. Our church! That just shocked me. Well, no it didn't. I was more like "so I'm not the only one!". But it was still a little shocking nevertheless, imagine your pastor saying that your church was talked about in a negative way. But I experienced that too. In youth group the teens were welcoming, but that was it. Once they found out my introvertedness, there weren't many interests, except for a couple...which then I messed up. But they don't understand! They don't understand what I'm feeling inside, how I'm feeling it, and what I do to keep it inside. They don't understand...ya'll prolly don't understand...
After the sermon my brother had a group practice with his band (it was pretty good in my opinion, except their drummer spot had to be filled in by the pianoist. So no keyboard or piano today, which was a bummer) and I went to kinda just drive around for 30 minutes. Found another shortcut to my uni from my church, and even a little park on the way back. Then when I arrived again at our church to wait about an hour till my brother was done, I got to read some bulletins and announcements at the front desk. They were nothing unusual, just the usual announcements from the groups. And then I found a book, a book about evidence for Christianity. I think this was the only book that I read so far that had to be the most comprehensible and the most matter-of-factual. Christianity: the faith that makes sense by Dennis McCallum. Yes, I took a picture of the cover with my cell phone to remember the title for later. I only read the last part, about basically the problem of evil. What was most striking to me was the fact that the author actually went through Christianity's past atrocities and...said that that was evil. I never heard anyone, author wise, do that! There were always some excuse to make sure that the Crusades were still righteous, or just quickly dismiss them with a "they weren't true Christians". But this guy, he went ahead and went through the facts. How the Christian church didn't bother teaching the laymen to read for a reason. How the Protestant Reformation was not all holy, how they continued the persecution that the Catholic church started. I recommend it.
After that little part of the day we went home, at home-made pizza and blueberry muffins, and then went to do our homework. For me, doing Chemistry homework was a big relief...there were 20 or so waiting homeworks online just for Chemistry, all due today, and getting them done was a huge burden taken off my shoulder.
Of course, now I have to go and finish The Groundwork to Metaphysics by Immanuel Kant...so I better go now, and I apologize for the rushed and childish sounding of the post. It will probably be like this for a while yet, until I sort the confusion out inside my head. I will keep on writing though. Writing for G-d.

G-d bless you all,
sc

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A video I found

I thought I would share this with you guys, it's a video about the song "Who Am I" by Casting Crowns. It is acted out by a youth group with just their hands. And while I found the clapping and cheering a bit annoying in the background, I did really like the video. :)



It touched me, somehow I felt it express my longing and wanting to understand that whole scenario that G-d did just for us.

G-d bless,
sc

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Here I am...again

So, even though I said I would start this back up in March, it's September already, and I posted nothing. Sorry bout that, I should be posting more often now. :)

What have I been up to you ask? Just the usual stuff. Y'know...college, my first car, my first courses, and so on. Nothing too terribly exciting.

Aww...who am I kiddin?! Of course I'm thrilled! College has been the most amazing thing anyone could ever ask for, it beats high school by a mile! So far I'm looking into majoring in pre-Nursing, hopefully that is the way G-d want's me to go. Speaking of G-d, I think I'll write about Him for a bit. You see, I haven't been praying or studying for a while, and as a result have been terribly away from Him. I'm sure most of you know about that feeling. Of being lonely, yet people tell you that He's there. But you're lonely, so that would imply that you can't feel Him...which you don't! How hard could it be to feel and know the Creator of you, me, the universe? How hard it could it be to talk to Him like friend to friend, son to father? To lean on Him when temptation and stress start bulging in on your life? How hard it could it be for the Creator of the universe to let Himself be known? To a college student! I mean, this is the age where we are searching for all kinds of truths! The truth of caring, nursing, rationalizing, the way the world works, is there a god? How hard is it to show just a itsy-bitsy teeny tiny itty bitty sign? It honestly can't be THAT hard. For the L-rd of the Universe? Come on...But who am I kidding...do I really want to know the most powerful being in all of life? If so, why? Why should I? To make my life better? The Bible says to not be selfish. Honestly, if I would truly want to answer the question, I would have to say that I want to know Him so I can rest. I know I only had a couple years of life, and according to statistics will have another 50-80 years left, but I am so tired. Tired of searching, of waiting, of wanting to know. Of all the responsibilities, of the false promises. Promises like, if you just go to your quiet place you will be alright. I do that. And I'm not alright after the 2 hours I'm there. During the 2 hours I'm just fine, but afterwards I'm back. Man it's hard...

I don't wanna grow up...I'm a Toys'R'Us kid.

I wonder how many other people feel this way. Not just of the tiredness of life and responsibilities, but of searching for G-d. If you are, could ya comment and let me know? It sounds terribly selfish, but sometimes it's good to know that I'm not alone. Of course, if you feel this way, you probably just want to be left alone. Like me. So many people, so many things, so fast. I diet and workout to change my body. But that's not the real reason. Ok, I diet to keep myself healthy, but then I workout to get that good feeling...and especially to be alone. In the gym everyone concentrates on their workouts, not on each other. So I workout, and I love working out alone. Don't get me wrong, I like working out with friends too, but nothing beats working out solo. Just me and the machines and dumbells.

I have so much to tell and so little time. It's 10pm already, and I got Biology at 7:45am tomorrow. Better go to sleep, especially if I don't want to fall asleep during my breaks. I need to study for that exam.

Thank you for reading this and I apologize for my tone. But this is my journal, so to speak, one of these days it will actually sound like one. :)

G-d bless,
sc

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I'm back!

Hello everyone,

First off: I decided to restart my blog! I think that it will help a lot in my time alone with God. And, if not with God, then at least I can complain to someone...even if noone reads this. :P That said, I think it would be best if I start off with what happened so far and without all that emotional stuff I will get into later.

On Christian Forums:

On this fine website I became a mod during the summer. This 183,535 member website is quite busy and as desperately looking for new mods. The requirements and application page is available to anyone on the bottom of any CF page "Be a mod" is the title. I am not allowed to talk about any inside stuff, like reports, etc. but will tell you all about something. I've created a Prayer Team. This team's basic function, so far, is to pray for anyone who submits a prayer request. My plans are, however, to make something like this:


So there is the Prayer Team and then it is divided into 5 subgroups. Each subgroup has a different mission, but it's up to the leaders to decide whether they would like to divide the subgroups further up into smaller groups or just let it be. The mission statements for each subgroup is stated under the graph. I really hope that we can get this new structure off the ground soon, it's been waiting for a couple weeks, but it all really depends on how fast Erwin makes the private forums for the Team. Speaking of which, he made a fellow mod of CF the head of the Team, so we decided to cohead it. Since I already have a Team with members in place. 40 some members to be exact. My hope? My biggest hope is that this is God's will. That I'm not just doing it for me, but for God's glory. I also hope that with the Team we can help CF's mission of "Uniting All Christians As One Body".

That's one new thing. The other is that I'm planning to start an Accountability Group on CF. It would look something like this:


Again, the Accountability Group will be split into 2 different groups, and then that split into 3 different groups. The purpose? To help people grow in faith and to help CF's mission statement to go along. Because of the responses I received from the other mods, supers, and admins, I think that the Omega Team, a team of pastors on CF, should head this. They know how to handle people, how to help them grow, how to direct such an Accountability Group, and how to organize such a group. Again, I hope this is God's will.

In real life:

I'm going to college next year! Not just college, but Taize and a missions trip to the Dominican Republic as well! Or so I thought...God moved to prevent these and other trips abroad. How? Well...my mom took the Citizenship test in the US to become a citizen. She passed and with her all her sons and daughters. So now I'm a citizen. However, as a consequence to this, our Hungarian passports are now unusable. The simple reason is that once we get out of the country, we (I) will have to do the whole test over, complete with waiting a few months to wait for the new passport to arrive. Currently it is set to arrive, at the earliest, at the exact date that I would come back from the missions trip. So all my out of the country plans are gone. Taize has been canceled simply because my father said that the experience at this French monastery will overwhelm me and thus make me unprepared for college. And I listened.

Furthermore, I am filling out scholarship applications from our school, all 30 of them, and submitting them by April 12th. So far I have around 20 done, counting those where I need my class rank and freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior GPAs. All of which I need to get from my Guidance Counselor. It'll be fun! ;)

That's it for now! I promised not to get into any emotional stuff, so I won't talk about God or my life. Ya'll are up to date!

May God watch over us all and keep us in His love and mercy,
sc

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